Disco Inferno


Am I alone in the dark again?

Apparently, I ramble, and not in the one foot in front of the other way. I shall leave that to mother, who is thriving.

I am also aware that you all care more about her, than you do about me!

The Government’s attempt to change the ‘Traffic Light System’ for travel has left us with something looking like the Pride Flag!

It reminds me of a line from Starman, where Jeff Bridges’s understanding of traffic lights is that red light, stop; green light, go; orange light, go very fast!

And yet, the Euros continue, on one hand the Pariah, the other the Saviour.

But, ‘Sleepy Joe’ is here, it will be shoes and socks off for barefoot stroll of the beach with our own Robinson Crusoe!

At this point, you must forgive me for playing around with French History, but it is the only way I can make this work, and it’s not as though anything that comes out of Hollywood is entirely factual and historically correct, and yes, it is only French history.

Faced with Monsieur Macron’s chagrin I will display my usual sang froid. Allez le Weekend!

Carrie Antoinette and the Sun In King tied the knot and retired to their Versailles.

I wonder what shape the champagne glasses were at their little gathering, and the garden was no doubt filled with confetti made from shredded super injunctions and NDAs.

Did I hear her say, “Qu’ils mangent de la Mr Kipling’s”!

In the Bois de Boulogne those exceedingly expensive net curtains are twitching, and the proletariat have become accustomed to Burnt Basque Cheesecake. (A recipe will follow at the end!)

One emissary returned from Lisbon; a trophy held aloft. Yet, no sooner had he planted himself on Terra Ferma when he received a note written in lemon juice from the Sûreté. He has been in contact with the inflicted.

Normally he would be expelled to the 16ieme arrondissement; but the Sun In King is clever.

He has devised a new challenge, 10 cunning tests for this transgressor, like Abraham, he is tested by a higher authority. A new one every day which will set him apart from mere mortals, yet he can move amongst us as if immune. This exemption elevates him to such a position of power he is unlikely to fail!

A friend asked for a similar dispensation, he was re-buffed.

It seems the rest of us will continue to tug our forelocks from under our flat caps, for we are not worthy.

Staycation, is whispered on the wind… with a knotted hankie for cover, my Bradshaw’s guide tucked under my arm, I may head for my childhood haunts of Crimdon Dene, Easington Colliery, Hartlepool and yes, Barnard Castle!

North of the ‘Red Wall’ to a place where the sun rarely shines and the foodie highlight will be Spam fritters, washed down with a pint of warm Newkee! Not much chance of romance soiree following that!

Burnt Basque Cheescake:

1kg Cream Cheese

6 eggs

400g of sugar

200ml of double cream

A tablespoon of plain flour

A splash of vanilla essence

Preheat the oven to 140C.

Whisk all the ingredients together by hand into a batter. Doing it by hand means you won’t over mix them.

Line a 10” spring form pan with baking parchment, and pour in the batter.

Place in the middle of the oven and cook for 20 minutes. Increase the temperature to 200C and cook for another 35 minutes, just keep an eye every so often and turn so it browns evenly on top.

The centre will still be soft.

Take it out, let it cool, and then remove the springform and place in the fridge overnight.

Copyright © 2021 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved

Leave a Reply