Let me start by saying I am overwhelmed and rendered speechless by your generosity, so a very big THANK YOU to all who have donated, and those donations in the 3 days since we started collecting now stand at more than £2500.

However, you know I’m going to keep sending this link until you all give £5 to a worthy Charity…..Help the Hospices.

http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/ADRIANHOLDSWORTHVOLPE

It’s 100 miles on a bike for a good cause, and I will auction my mink covered saddle at the end of it. Yes the mink is re cycled……. Hahahahaha….. It’s a joke, clearly not a good one.

I do already have a very large offer from a Japanese buyer. The saddle will disappear into their private collection alongside Cher’s spider dress and the tricycle from The Shining.

What a busy month it has been, and where do I begin?

Firstly, the Italian economy has slipped back into recession. So they won’t be sponsoring my effort!

Can’t say I’m not surprised, everybody who can leave Italy, has; leaving the rest to pay the tax the others are avoiding paying. Those that I deal with think it is appropriate behaviour to increase their prices by 10% because the pound is slightly stronger than it was six months ago! What would your response be? Mine was blunt and unrepeatable!

Silvio has managed to get off whatever traffic violation he may have committed. Apparently the latest was bumping his car into a curb, whilst travelling at low speed and being distracted by a pretty passer-by on her way home from school.

It is that time of year again? Perseus is in Naples once more, he of the cadaverous Persil white feet. Once again he’s torn deciding to fake it or not. His flamboyant tantrums when the spray-on tan has streaked on his feet are a sight to behold, spitting vitriol like Medusa; a gaze and an arched eyebrow you are turned to stone. I could imagine Danny LaRue used a similar glare.

It’s a slightly camper look than Neil in Ibiza uses to scare away people he doesn’t think worthy of his talent, which is considerable.

Before I re-count my last visit, Neil has now launched Inkadelic Hotel. It is an apartment in the heart of Ibiza Town, and anyone wishing any details, please contact me for information and photos. Neil is calmness personified amongst the maelstrom that is life on the island.

Not that many of you believe me; but my visits to Ibiza are not to party, I prefer to lie on a beach and rest.

However the last visit got a little out of hand! I suppose I should learn at my age to say, No. But where would the fun in that be?

Sunday night was spent at Blue Marlin (BM), courtesy of Jean-Claude Ades with a magnificent set in the company Eugene (Puppy Master), and the lovely Bella from Copenhagen.

Well, didn’t you know it. Bottles of Dom Perignon glow in the dark and at BM each is accompanied to your table by a tickitape parade? The table next to us was obviously indulging in the inauguration of a new President, given the continuous shower of confetti, but to their credit, they were sharers.

Break out the glo-sticks…..

We departed BM before I turned back into a pumpkin, and headed for another party at S’estanyol held by Mental Genius with a light show projected against the rocks to carry us through to sunrise.

The following night when the head should have said no, we all went to Amnesia at 4am. Eugene in his full headgear, and me wondering what the hell I was doing…..I looked up to the ceiling waving my hands above my head only to see daylight, my feet were killing me and I looked down to see I was only wearing one glass slipper. 7 am and time to go, I left Eugene and Bernie to party through.

A boat was waiting, and a trip to Formentera beckoned, as long as Eugene could get back in one piece, after all he was driving! The boat!!!!!

The day was topped off with Eugene tellng the Restaurant at Beso Beach on Formentera that it was my birthday. Amr and Hamsi, you now know it wasn’t, but it didn’t stop us having fun. Hope you and the family had a great time. Eugene, as you are reading this, please send me the photos. I’m fairly certain there are none of us all skinny dipping. Just how did your shorts make it to the bottom?

On the way to a deserted lagoon we came across a family in distress after their tender had got detached form their yacht we towed them back, to re-unite them with their son.

I returned from Ibiza via Rome, to the Sale in full swing and Jake holding the fork, sorry fort. Current bargain are socks at £5/pair, get ‘em while they’re hot.

The bargains will continue until the end of the first week of September, when we will have some new bits to show you.

One friend Mark has been in several times. He has been trying on a couple of vintage mink coats in the vain hope that they might keep him extra warm and toasty for the winter, not to mention make him look, well? Mark it’s not a good look, only a mink coat, socks and trainers, please keep the coat fastened, it’s a disturbing fantasy and not one I want to be a part of.  Save it for when you drink the mini-bar dry again.

Another Mark has informed me he is currently covered in gravel rash after severe equipment failure at high speed on his bicycle. Pah! Ask Andre how he ended up with a grazed chin!

Last weekend I travelled back to 1955, Secret Cinema and Back to the Future; Hill Valley exists in East London.

Blessed by the continuing good weather, we could wander round Hill Valley and mingle with Marty, Doc Emmett Brown, and the Libyans; visit the Enchanted under the Sea Dance and finally relax on the grass and watch the film. All the girls squealed every time MJFox made an appearance on film, the guys did exactly the same each time the DeLorean reached 88mph.

It was a great afternoon, however, I have the odd gripe and maybe I’m getting old. Have I said that before?

Hill Valley felt like a film set, which was perhaps the point, but I also thought it was supposed to be an interactive experience and the sparseness of the props made it feel a little empty, and a little like wandering round Ikea, desperately trying not to tread on the heals of the person walking round in front of you, but with a glass in hand.

As you know I do not have a problem spending money; as long as a degree of value for money is considered. Secret Cinema has now become an expensive enterprise, you have to hand in your communication devices (phones) and hence no photos of the event and yet another spectacular sunset. You are searched for food and drink, and then to add insult to financial pain the last train from the nearest station is before the end of the film, stranding you close to the Olympic Park, the middle of nowhere; leaving you queueing for a taxi for not an inconsiderable period of time at further cost unless you exit early.

Finally back to the ride. Below is the link to sponsor me.

I shall be wearing the sponsored “puppies” on my person for the bike ride, and I look forward to having a lot of fun, and finishing at some point after Christmas. Jake, how many sleeps is that?

http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/ADRIANHOLDSWORTHVOLPE

My thanks to Neil, Neil, Eugene, Adam, Sara, Jake, Sunil, Wolf, Mark, Mark, Perseus, Sam, Vash, The Wolseley, Me, Me, Me and many, many, many others for making this newsletter possible. There are too many to mention and age has got the better of me.

As a friend said to me today, he is terrified he will do something worthy of an appearance in the newsletter. Today he did, he left London for Scotland to distil whisky for a living.

Your exploits are the thing of legend, and if not I will turn them into one.

The shop is 15 years old on the 20^th August. Thank you all very much it has been an absolute joy to make so many friends.

 

Copyright © 2014 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved.