Volpe Sartoriale

http://www.volpesartoriale.com

The new website is up and running, full of photos and with a video still to come, it is not and is never likely to be a trading website, but more a window into the world of clothing we make.

I must say a huge ‘Thank you’ to my close friend and model Kirk Newmann, and the producer and photographer James Nader of Visual Prestige Agency. The results speak for themselves, incredibly impressive and innovative work.

The blog and existing website will continue as is, there is a menu tag for the new website on the old and visa-versa.

Sadly for you lot I will continue to attempt to write.

Finally before a Newsletter, a thank you to each and every one of you who has made what I do so much fun. Without this I would not be doing a job I love and dealing with people I consider friends. ‘Thank you’ I’ll be coming back as me too!

So, without further ado.

Bet you wondered where I had got too!

Well, like Santa Claus I have been dealing with a very long list of requests.

The list stretches to the gates of Hades and almost to a man, or woman there was a theme. Why do you want to come back as me? It’s not as if I am a playboy of the status of Lapo Elkann. Who he you ask?

Lapo is the grandson of Gianni Agnelli, and don’t ask, who he? Look it up, I am not Wikipedia, I only write this and I still have to look things up!

Lapo is trying his hardest to keep up with me, but it seems like it snows all year round in his world, and where as the rest of us would have a minor tantrum if all was not well with the world, Lapo pretends he has been kidnapped, and with his well-documented issues of what seems real to him, well m’lud I rest my case.

Yet I still wonder why me?

Trips to exotic locations. Always on a plane with a party to go to, and to paraphrase a thousand songs “New York, St Tropez, Tokyo, Miami and Ibiza, da da da”.

I could be a songwriter and I can’t wait to become Interstellar star on Jupiter, Mars, Alpha Centauri, Zubenelgenubi, well U all know where this is disappearing!

Superstar

Superstar

Sheila from BA is plying me with champagne, ensuring that my fun levels are topped up. After all, everybody loves champagne…

I am Pitbull without the looks, off the leash and I’m not wearing a muzzle, I am celebrating, mazel tov!

As sure as eggs are eggs (thoughts are turning to Easter already?), Jake has reminded me that it is only a certified number of sleeps to Christmas, and if I hadn’t stopped him, he would have reeled off the number of hours, minutes, perhaps snowflakes before the auspicious day. He’s 33 years old and yet seems keener than a 10 year old and trying to deflect from the performance of his beloved Wolves.

OK, OK, perhaps I’m a jaded old trump, but I am tiring of the Americanisation of everything.

The hands across the sea relationship now seems like Uncle Sam has his hand in our back pocket and is rummaging around for our wallet.

Black Friday and Cyber Monday, what are they? An event crammed between Trick or Treat and the Nightmare before Christmas?

There is recount going on in 3 American States because of Vlad the Lad’s apparent handiwork, Hillary is personally recounting all the votes, one for me, one for me…

Hopefully it will take her four years.

I would believe in conspiracy, but the aluminium foil helmet and dongle I fashioned myself means I now have Blueteeth, and wifi streaming directly into my brain, the X-ray specs I bought out of the back of a comic as a kid aged seven are finally working!

Mr Assange has been inside my head, you didn’t stay long did you Jules? Heheheh!

Meanwhile Lord Farage of Brexeter, will be attempting to remove a friend of mine from his current position, no, no not our excellent Ambassador to the United States, mind you I’m sure Sir Kim might be happier if it were the case.

I can see Donald throwing these lavish White House parties where there will be a dress code and all the men have to wear these ridiculously long red ties, and not much else, which would probably be much more up Nige’s street.

However it is pantomime season and I received an email from my celebrity friend who has been remarkably quiet of late. I removed him from the mailing list at his behest because he had complained that my life seemed so much more fun than his, but it looks like he has been playing catch up via the website.

Well yes, of course it is, and when you are relegated to the horse’s arse it can feel a bit like pushing something uphill. However Nige is happy to take on this role as long as The Donald takes up the front end and the Pony Club can plait his mane.

Imagine it; The Donald and Nige doing dressage, like Crystal Tips and Alistair, it will be more like Doctor Dolittle’s Pushme-Pullyou, you could franchise it for TV, and call it ‘Ballroom Blitz’ compered by Mickey Mouse dressed as a magician and waving a wand. Couples could include….. Why don’t you think about it?

I’ll start you off with Jeremy Clarkson and James May; Michael Gove and Michael Gove, Dear SIlvio and Vlad the Lad…

Suggestions on the back of a stamped, addressed envelope, don’t forget to include one of the new fivers, tallow aren’t I!

Finally the travel section, well given the amount I travel it is long overdue. Well maybe in the bumper Christmas edition of he newsletter!

 

Copyright © 2016 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

November Newsletter 2014

New Stock follows this Newsletter,however this one includes at least one image you will find disturbing!

One of the reasons for the tardiness was the death of my Aunt Kathleen aged 96 years and 364 days, peacefully in her sleep. If you would be kind enough to read the newsletters posted just before this one, both she and I would be very happy and you will get a sense from whence the madness stems!

I am sending this out on the biggest party night of the year, with the exception of New Year, so that you will all have something to stare at bleary-eyed during tomorrow’s hangover. Remember joyfully that I don’t suffer from them!

To those of you sipping on Dom Perignon and Krug, don’t overdo it, save a bottle for me.

Basket Case

Basket Case

Had to get that photo out of the way; Paul and Ines, I am speechless, but that’s because I have a brownie in my mouth.

Well I have had to start again, I somehow managed to delete, even in this auto saved world, the draft of the newsletter.

It was going to be the greatest one yet, the funniest, the one most likely to reduce you to tears of joy and tears of sadness. My “Cinquanta sfumature di Grigio”, più piselli Norma.

But sadly the dog ate my homework, the collection was stolen from the warehouse the night before it was to be shown, the cheque is in the post!

I could of course have copied one from before and would you have known the difference? Probably not. So this one is BARKING!

The newsletter is now read in 110 countries, and I am stalked on several social media sites in several more, you know who you are, and so do I.

No it wasn’t the little green spiders in Coogan’s Bluff, wasn’t Tisha Sterling gorgeous, and mental!

I hadn’t shared anything with Neil or Eugene, it all started much earlier.

Any excuse for a photo!

Tisha Sterling

Tisha Sterling

For those who don’t believe that I am mad, here is my Santa outfit. Now you could have had this as a Christmas card, now where did I hide that Werther’s Original.

Santa Lycra

Santa Lycra

 

That’s my kind of Christmas Onesie, my David Gandy look.

Like comparing me to David Gandy, life often looks as though it’s going to offer diamonds and ends up giving you bricks. This happened recently happened when I hired a car. The guys at Avis excitedly told me they’d upgraded my car to a BMW 4 series with an M specification.

Pah! M spec meant leather interior and heated seats. If I wanted heated seats, I’d wriggle around a little. The engine was a 2 litre diesel and automatic gearbox had four settings Eco (very kind to bunnies), Comfort (Werther’s Original), Sport (Tear the skin off a rice pudding, just), and Sport with all the driving aids turned off (Tear the skin off a rice pudding, but just don’t try going round a corner at anything over the speed limit), as if I would! All show, and no go.

Ahhh, I’ve just remembered what I’d started writing in the other Newsletter that I lost.

Starlings, they don’t like poppadums!

I tried to find a photo of the two together, failed miserably therefore it must be true.

Thank you Reggie Perrin, I’d forgotten. Not only is the madness hereditary, it has been absorbed by the process of osmosis using society’s semi-permeable membrane; television, and a diet of Monty Python and Reginald Perrin.

I also predict; come the first warming rays of sun in springtime we will see the demise of the beard. The reason, well not only do starlings not like poppadums; they won’t nest in beards, mainly because the guys put up one heck of fight when the starlings start their murmation.

And all because I liked this photo.

Murmation

Murmation

Later in the month I will publish a list of trends for next year, some ups, some downs and a few things that are not likely to change.

Hopefully we will sense and get rid of things such as Black Friday, replace it with either Dodgeball,or Rollerball, both of which will be much safer.

In the not too distant future Black Fridays will no longer exist, but there will be Rollerball.

In the not too distant future Black Fridays will no longer exist, but there will be Rollerball.

The footage was fascinating, disturbing and funny all at the same time. We of course do not stoop so low as to offer a Black Friday event, our wine tastings offer a similar experience with alcohol involved.

A big thank you to all who attended, the next one will take place in January, when you are all supposed to be dry.

Wolf who is a regular is big into 3D printing has produced a Christmas Quiz which will be mailed out with the Christmas Newsletter. Don’t worry he does get out a little and is headed to LA and NYC for the festivities.

Now a little plug.

I have a friend and it is not Wolf, who is starting to produce 3D printed chess pieces from his own CAD files.

Here are some examples, maintaining the bird theme.

Rook and Pawns

Rook and Pawns

 

Copyright © 2014 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved.