Aesculapius and Salus


Washed Leather Belts £120 – Fringed Dark Brown and Charcoal – Punched Olive, Tan and Dark Brown

The Pink Moon, is resplendent in the night sky as it resides in Libra, the Sun is in Aries, and Mars has joined Saturn in Aquarius.

What does this mean?

I, have absolutely no idea!

However, I do know more than one person, who on being given the task to write Horoscopes for reasonably important publications, has made them up… Agreed, one of them was for a men’s fashion magazine which required them to outline a look, per Star Sign for an entire month.

I have never seen such a jumble of brands and looks, but at least I was able to work out people’s Star Sign just from what they were wearing, walking down street…

No wonder people dress as they do… Such dramatic influence must be used sparingly, even cautiously. It is not a good look to wander down to join the queue for Waitrose sporting a paisley, silk dressing gown, Chelsea Boots, a Daunt Books tote and Linda Farrow sunglasses, I guess he was a Virgo, and will remain that way for a time to come!

Agreed, you could go out looking like that, but given people’s struggle with self-isolation, such power must be restrained, measured even, like gently blowing on the brass ended tape measure. At least at no point did they waggle a wistful finger in the direction of the Emperor’s new clothes, with the warmer weather, the results could be catastrophic.

I remain through this, at the end of a phone…

STOP PRESS: Somehow unrelated to the Emperor’s new wardrobe. We are facing a condom shortage… Why? We are all supposed to be social distancing, and I am yet to see anyone, even the great William Wilde create anything made of latex that is 2 metres thick. Call me insensitive, but really! No, wait… with the shortage of surgical gloves, we can all wear them as mittens, after all we do have opposable thumbs and they come pre-prepared with hand sanitizer!

I had a conversation in the street yesterday evening, lasting 5 minutes and 37 seconds at a distance 4.6 metres, with a couple of very friendly neighbours, who may or may not be horrified with their inclusion, regarding the moon, the Italian village of Nerola, and my non-existent classical education.

Nerola sounds like a very pleasant Italian red wine.

However, after researching it on Google, The Sun and the BBC, I hasten to add not The Mail Online; to spare my sanity. It is a beautiful village nestling in hills close to Rome, and it seems that I am not the only one researching it. It’s 1900 inhabitants are locked down and the authorities have decided the residents are now part of a trial, Guinea Pigs in a human laboratory to be tested to discover how COVID-19 spreads between groups of people. Italy has suffered more than most, let us hope something wonderfully positive comes from this.

I will end with a thought for those amongst us who have become, Aesculapius and Salus, they are not one God or Goddess, but an army, let us be grateful for them.

And a battle prayer: O Lord! Thou knowest how busy I must be this day: if I forget thee, do not thou forget me.

Copyright © 2020 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved


A newsletter to herald the beginning of Autumn – September 2017

Beelzebub asked me to step forward and take up a new role as an influencer, which means I get to test lots of free things and write about them. The upside is that you know this means all the ‘millennials’ are going to hell.

My dream job, but, hang on, hadn’t I being do that all these years, isn’t this why you all want to come back as me; has my work gone unappreciated by the ‘Dark Lord’?

‘Ungrateful’ is the only printable word I can come up with, a ten letter word in a nine letter game.

For years I have been successfully leading you all astray, with a collection of the Emperor’s finest new clothes, and now ‘He’ says he wants me to influence you. Pah. May he burn in the fires of hell, along with his six brothers!

You want a piece of me, exactly mate you, and whose family?

Step outside the gates of the dark web and we’ll see who is boss.

Anyway they’ve been way too busy, the seven princes have infested the Premier League, Costa, Sanchez, Aguero, Ozil, Coutinho, Mahrez and Vardy have spread unrest and dissent amongst the ranks of the faithful.

Several of them have got their fingers trapped in the transfer window as it closed, that’s got to hurt! They’ll now all be sulking around for the next 4 months blowing on them until the portal opens once more, meanwhile their harbingers are wandering round with begging bowls the size of the dish at the Arecibo Observatory, which just so happens to be the size of 30 football pitches.

Arsene Wenger has once more shown he is suffering from ‘Martyr Complex’, ‘the belief that as a  martyr he has been singled out for persecution because of exceptional ability or integrity’! My good friend Tony describes football as theatre for the working class, he’s so

Along with the new football season we have heralded in autumn, cooler nights, the harvest, SAD lamps, it won’t be good enough to set your smartphone screen to the highest setting, pumpkins, and Tressemay might be caught clod hopping through fields of wheat, searching for a five bar gate.

Behind her trying to resolve the revolving Brexit negotiations, the five have hopped over a stile and are off to Smuggler’s Top via Castaway Hill. Giggling and squabbling, DD, BJ, Foxy, Pretty P and Amber with her ruddy complexion have gone off in search of the drinks cabinet and lashings of ginger bear, or more likely pink gin.

Playa del Muro

Anyways, back to my role as an influencer. As you well know I have been going to Ibiza for an age, please don’t ask it’s not polite, but this year I have been sunning myself on Mallorca, momentarily waiting for someone to let some of the air out of Ibiza’s tyres, before it really does turn into the Las Vegas of Europe. I stayed in two beautiful family run small hotels, in both the service and food were impeccable and with fantastic pools:

Can Moio


Driverless cars – The future

Cata at Can Moio and Cristina at Hort de cas Misser were both wonderful hosts, and both places offer very different rural environments.

Nature Reserve at Playa del Muro

I am about to be controversial, but as an influenza I think those big ole bushy beards are about to catch a cold. I know; I know you’ll say I’ve had it in for them all along, but by next summer everyone will have chins more like Peter Perfect.

Have I turned into a news junkie, I can feel a rising panic, life on earth is to be threatened by a shower of comets and meteors caused by the beautiful Gisele 710. How could something with such a balletic name threaten our lovely planet, perhaps by an act of love she will free us from the grasp of this evil and Albrecht will defend us from the Wilis with his mighty sword… Sorry stopped to breathe into a paper bag for a moment… I was hyperspacing!

Phew, finally read the article to the end, it’s OK apparently it’s not going to happen for another 1.3 million years and by then I’ll be ready retire anyway, I’m sure skin treatments will have moved on and I won’t need to put my face on the ironing board.

There’s a good chance by then that Donald may have tripped over the end of his long red tie and stumbled onto the nuclear button, or Lil’ Kim may have nuked the bloke who cuts his hair, it’s a work of art according to my good friend Raoul, who well versed in these things. By all accounts the bowl they cut round to get this shape from can only be found deep in the Amazon and it is used to prepare hallucinogenic compounds, however it seems it is available for Prime delivery!!

A panorama what a surprise and the church I found there.

Looking over Pollenca

Church up there


Copyright © 2017 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved.