November 2011 – Volpe Newsletter

Well where do I begin? I think there is a song in that one. Perhaps I should start the next one with “This is the story of my life”!

It has been quite a month. It started with; did I mention I had a birthday?  Oh yes, of course I did.

And those of you unlucky enough to be in the shop at the time will have heard the Christmas iTunes playlist that we have been playing since July. Prompted by the number of sleeps to Christmas and the introduction of Siri, Whereby all I have to say is “don’t play Christmas playlist” and Siri replies “Oh please, not again I’m really bored of this now. Can’t you ask me something intellectual? Darling.” Siri calls me “Darling”, but obviously as she gets to know the “real” me, I’m sure this will change.

We started to roll out the bling. Eric picked up his fur lined Parka, as did Stottie and they both looked “fine”, I think it’s a word the young use these days. It was always “cool” or “bad” in my youth. Oh stop laughing it was only a birthday. Do you have to keep reminding me? If it goes on like this I’ll have to go back under the knife again.

Meanwhile I’ll just keep using the lotions and potions to maintain my healthy glow. I have added an extra dimension to my training regimen. OT continues apace, but now Neil, Iyo and Sam add a Thursday morning workout when they are not training their own clients. Soon to join us will be Doug. He’s our celebrity trainer, can’t say who, but…. And no, it’s not me or one of mine.

Have any of you ever seen a celebrity in the shop? The only one I can name is the invisible man and there we are, back to the joke about Superman, Wonder Woman and the Invisible Man. Look it up if you must, it’s not one I can tell here. It’s also one of Jake’s, so don’t blame me.

Talking of Jake, we are only 14 games into the season, and already he’s really starting to twitch on Saturday afternoons. It was worse last season if you remember back that far, but it’s starting to show great promise. One place off the relegation zone, I can see that it is the cover for the iPhone is jinxing everything. I rest my case m’lud. Jake you know what to do. I wonder if there is an App to tell you the number of games until the end of the season.

OK, OK I’ll lay off Jake, I know how many of you have a soft spot for him, and I’ll go no further than that.

Dear Silvio is gone, but not forgotten. Governments always worry about who is sniping at them from the back benches. There is always the saying about keeping your friends close, and your enemies closer still. Perhaps in Dear Silvio’s case he may need a full time female Police bodyguard to protect him. If you have seen the YouTube clip, I’m sure they will be queuing up. It’s strange how suddenly the whole nation no longer wants him after being such a darling. (Not now Siri). However this might give him the chance to sneak off and get that hair transplant he was always after.

A couple of Christmas plugs to finish with. If you spotted the joke, you’re a better man than me.

Cerise Patent Black

I have been chatting to a young lady who makes truly beautiful ladies shoes. What makes it worse is that she is so nice. Her name is Aruna Seth, so if you should need a “guilt gift” this winter! If not, she does go up to a size 42, even I could get into a pair of those. I’m just not sure I could stagger around like a pantomime dame. Who said “Not again”?

For the guys it has to be MCT watches,

Finally if you need to send them anywhere, you can always use Mark Williams’ services at Mail Shot International. There you are Mark, more plugs than Silvio’s forehead.

No, I’m not putting links in for you. Goodness, do I have to everything?

Copyright © 2011 Adrian Holdsworth. All Rights Reserved.